Romulus

por Natalia Maeda

Me comove a honestidade dessa música de Sufjan Stevens. A letra fala da relação entre dois irmãos e sua mãe, com quem sempre tiveram pouco contato, e da mistura de encantamento e vergonha que emerge nos tempos em que passam juntos.

Once when our mother called,
She had a voice of last year’s cough.
We passed around the phone,
Sharing a word about Oregon.
When my turn came, I was ashamed.
When my turn came, I was ashamed. 

Once when we moved away,
She came to Romulus for a day.
Her Chevrolet broke down.
We prayed it’d never be fixed or found.
We touched her hair, we touched her hair.
We touched her hair, we touched her hair. 

When she had her last child,
Once when she had some boyfriends, some wild.
She moved away quite far.
Our grandpa bought us a new VCR.
We watched it all night, but grew up in spite of it.
We watched it all night, but grew up in spite of it. 

We saw her once last fall.
Our grandpa died in a hospital gown.
She didn’t seem to care.
She smoked in her room and colored her hair. 

I was ashamed, I was ashamed of her
I was ashamed, I was ashamed of her
I was ashamed, I was ashamed of her
I was ashamed, I was ashamed of her.

Ouvir essa música me trouxe algo parecido com compaixão. Penso que todos temos carências profundas e as compartilhamos sem saber, como peixes isolados em aquários enfileirados. Outro dia vi escrito em algum lugar que dentro do peito de cada pessoa existe “um vazio do tamanho de Deus”, e penso que isso deve ser bem verdade. Talvez exista um rio bem à nossa frente e não o enxergamos simplesmente porque achamos que a nossa dor é única demais para outros a sentirem também.

Anúncios